Annoyingly, this is a natural occurance on the path of growing up. When you meet a partner the only thing you want to do is send time with them. We've all been/will be there one day and that is okay. The emotions gained from are strong - that you are wanted and loved and missed and enjoyed.
And when Laura* met "the one" we were all really happy for her. I'd sit up with her well into the morrow as she spoke about how amazing and handsome this guy was, as he was texting sloppy messages about missing her completely.
Young love at its finest.
Then came the ditching. Normally I'd nod in agreement when she said she couldn't make our ritual date nights and sigh at how she'd never answer her phone when she was with him. Pretty normal. Everyone does it. It wont last once the realtionship becomes stable, she'll realise the error of her ways...
Oh no. Fast forward a year...
I jumping around the room becasue a film I've been waiting ages to watch is just about to be released. I made her take a blood oath and swear on everyone we knew that we'd watch it together, on its day of release like we did in high school...and as the day comes...she can't make it.
That I didn't care about. So serious facebook stalking came and went and guess what: She watched it with him instead and didn't even have the curtsey to tell me. This would have been the last straw - perhaps many people would will me morally insane for not even confronting about the matter. Yes I was pissed off - wasted a handful of tears at this betrayal and pondered over and over again whether the relationship I have with her - was the same as the relationship she had with me.
I didn't think so. I was a "last resort" thing when He was busy and I doubted that a relationship can live like that. So I gathered I'd delete her from my cyberspace and eventually from my life...and as I went on the computer I discovered that on my Calendar was a quote: Never be the first to burn a bridge, that could be your only way back.
And bam. I didn't. I am still her friend and we still chat. I rarely am the first to make a date now though, and pent anger to my other friends who think I'm mad. Ever rarer do I tell her how some of her decisions to be with him over me hurt. I'm pretty darn good at wrapping up my own wounds anyway. And why I hear you ask?
Because Laura is happy. And I want everyone to be happy - that is my greatest flaw - and leaving her behind will make her sad and the guilt of that would probably eat me from the inside out.
Friendship is important and even though I believe that there are some bridges in life you need to burn once crossed, 10 years of friendship can sometimes be worth it's weight in gold.
Right?
Nikki
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